It’s Friday, and I feel like exposing CBS for the provincial idiots they are. Here’s the letter that the Standards and Practices committee sent to all of the Grammy performers and presenters:
Please be sure that buttocks and female breasts are adequately covered. Thong type costumes are problematic. Please avoid exposing bare fleshy under curves of the buttocks and buttock crack. Bare sides or under curvature of the breasts is also problematic. Please avoid sheer see-through clothing that could possibly expose female breast nipples. Please be sure the genital region is adequately covered so that there is no visible “puffy” bare skin exposure.
Dear readers, do we think whoever wrote this letter has an Oedipus complex? Either that or they were the screenwriters for this VD PSA from the seventies:
Seriously, was Pink supposed to wear sweats while doing this?
Oh no you don’t Rihanna!
(And P.S. Stop dating that thug Chris Brown. He will drag you down.)
Oh right. No cutting edge Lady Gaga?
And let’s face it, where would we all have be with Lil Kim?
Hear that celebrities? Pick up your pamphlets at the end of the red carpet, so that YOU know how to dress for success, and provide optimal coverage of all your vital parts.
Let us all hope that someone whips off a jacket and shows a little “Undercurvature”. After all, isn’t this why we watch the Grammy’s? Meg hopes the show doesn’t turn into turn into some Amish reality series on TLC.